All posts by Dr. Robin Starbuck

About Dr. Robin Starbuck

Professor of English 1973 M.A., New York University 1989 Ph.D., New York University Linguistics

We lie. -rjs

Robin Starbuck

We lie. Sorry, no offense intended. But we do. How are you? Just fine. Liar!
Prolly not a good opening paragraph but sniveling half- truths ain’t getting nowhere! We want want want some thing and we’re not getting it! So we fabricate and tweak our story to fit our perceptions of what we believe to be incumbent upon us.
Now we feel better knowing how dearly we deserve that thing we want!
We say i believe i believe when we haven’t a clue. And oh so patiently wait for that thing to drop into our proverbial lap.

Puns for the educated minds…

Humor - remember that? LoL

Puns for the educated minds…

How does Moses make his tea? Hebrews it.

A cartoonist was found dead in his home. Details are sketchy.

I used to be a banker, but then I lost interest.

England has no kidney bank, but it does have a Liverpool.

They told me I had type-A blood, but it was a Type-O.

I changed my iPod’s name to Titanic. It’s syncing now.

I stayed up all night to see where the sun went, and then it dawned on me.

I’m reading a book about anti-gravity. I just can’t put it down.

I did a theatrical performance about puns. It was a play on words.

Why were the Indians able to settle here first? They had reservations.

We’re going on a class trip to the Coca-Cola factory. I hope there’s no pop quiz.

I didn’t like my beard at first. Then it grew on me.

Did you hear about the cross-eyed teacher who lost her job because she couldn’t control her pupils?

When you get a bladder infection….you know urine trouble.

Broken pencils are pretty much pointless.

What do you call a dinosaur with an extensive vocabulary? A thesaurus.

I dropped out of the Communism class because of lousy Marx.

I got a job at a bakery because I kneaded dough.

Dream was sorely lacking -rjs

Robin Starbuck

Upon further scrutiny
That dream “I” just awoke from
Seemed sorely lacking.
No birth, growth, maturity,
No history whatsoever
Just its own impudence.

“I” spent ten years schlepping
To and fro the university
For what?
Bought books and shit like that.
Pored over them, digested them
And spat them out.

Then this audacious dream occurs
Where’d all “my” learning go?
Why am “I” not turned around
At the slightest presentation anymore?
The dream doesn’t apologize.

It looks at … or, through, “me”
Says “your” examination expired.
Who says there ever was a “you”?
Who says there ever was?
Who says there ever?
Who says?

Robin Starbuck